Saturday, September 23, 2017

Untitled

Today you are all day
On my mind.
I hear your sighs
In the wind
I see your lips
In the leaves of
The Na tree.
The silver finger nail moon
In the sky
Is your smile.

Both now are beyond my touch.

I miss you.
Not the cursing, swearing
you, now filled with the rage of a hurricane
not the you with the stone heart
But the you who dried my tears
And said you will never forget me
The you whose hands
sculpted for me a penguin
out of a cake of yellow soap.
This is not a poem.
It is not a plea.

It is just a note
my tears wrote.

Friday, August 25, 2017

Gecko



 
when love releases you
from its warm embrace
your first impulse is to hug yourself
to keep away the chill
Odd, that need for self preservation
even in the moment
you’re  tottering at the edge


of the world.
The body goes on
even when the soul has
been torn out
the limbs move, the eyes blink, the nails grow
stubborn in their slow routine
and the heart keeps running
its steady and futile race
like the tail
that wriggles
long after the gecko has gone

Stitch your Eyelids Shut 2010  (Akna: Colombo)

Crossings: a memory map



(For my sister, 2007)

In a few weeks
you will
cross several oceans
and two continents
in search of new beginnings
and fulfillment of old needs

my mind hovers around
the days we sailed paper boats
on rivers made by
monsoon rain on a coconut estate
streams afloat
with pol mal and tamarind shells
and halts near the talk
of leaving
the concept of home
and crossing oceans.

With you I have confronted
the intricate twists of
growing up
negotiated the algorithms
of loving and losing
divided grief
into manageable chunks
With you I have constructed a history.

So geography shall remain
only a syllable
as you leave,
a small twig in the river
that flows inexorably
to the sea


Cadaver



They say that holding on to the past
is like tying a corpse
to your back and taking it along
with you
wherever you go,
the stench horrible,
people around you hold their noses
and avoid you like

the proverbial plague.
(A radio DJ spouts such
words of wisdom
between Beyonce’s song
about replacing her lover
and a commercial for detergents)

Driving in rush hour traffic
with a knot of grief
in my throat
I believe he’s speaking
just to me.
So I’m thinking
I should let memory die
let loving you go
imagine the maggots surface
white and thick and sticky
from the depths of  your eyes
I drowned in once
and try to hold in my hands
the crumbling flesh
of your once-loved body
as it falls
bit
by
bit
from
the skeleton of
your devotion
I should untie you
from the back of my heart
dig a hole in the dark deep
night of my past
and bury you,
kisses and all.